Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Seahawk Studs Suspended for Smoking Plant Less Harmful Than Alcohol

The Seahawks will battle the Saints next Monday for first place in the NFC without two of their top defensive backs, Brandon Browner and Walter Thurmond.  Second-stringers will have to do their best to slow down Drew Brees because the starters smoked pot and got caught.  To be fair, Browner’s gotten burned a bunch this year; maybe he’s been playing baked.  But Thurmond surely hasn’t, all he’s done is relax with a joint or two rather than pound Vicoden and beer like his peers do.[1]

Yeah, Ricky Williams and Tyrion Mathieu smoked weed and maybe it messed with their heads a bit.  But it’s way better that they puffed herb than abused alcohol, isn’t it? Athletes’ bodies are fine-tuned machines, booze is horrible for them, so what - jocks don’t get to hang?  Marijuana use doesn’t signal “character issues”, it signals interesting characters, like basketball’s Bill Walton and Bison Dele.  But football players are only encouraged / allowed to be macho drunk meatheads.

What’s with all the NFL DUIs anyways?  Can’t y’all afford drivers?

[1] SI’s Michael McKnight reports that many NFL players “see marijuana as a viable option to the pills and injections given to them by their employers to manage the side effects of their violent occupation.” (‘Joint Account, The politics of pot in professional football’, Sports Illustrated, Nov. 25, 2013)

Monday, November 18, 2013

The Trajectory of Russell Wilson’s Balls

He flings Tecmo Bowl blimpballs, easy for receivers to adjust to; his range is about 70 yards.  Kid’s got a cannon – everyone remembers his “Simultaneous Possession” hail mary to Tate.  Hawks fans also remember well number 3's heave that beat Brady last year.  His precision touchdown to Baldwin Sunday just before halftime (it must be mentioned: he manages the game well) was beautiful, it plopped down right where only his guy could catch it; above double coverage with pinpoint accuracy.

Also, Russell Wilson has courage.  And ambition and drive.  In a word, balls.  I like that he’s studious (whenever it’s the D’s turn he retires to the bench with his notebook and immerses himself in intellectual analysis of the game) does well in interviews, etcetera.  I like that he's heady: he only runs when he has to, and protects himself.  I like that he played baseball, because he knows how to slide, and can flip backhanded touchdown pitches.  I love that he sacks up in crunchtime, and that he sprints out of the pocket and threatens to run... then throws over the top like Randall Cunningham.

And I love that fact that the young man has proven himself to be a mature and capable leader.  I trust him to use the clock to his advantage, and to make something happen with his huge gun or his lightening quick pistons, and never to bitch when he gets hit.  Never to commit a personal foul (unless someone deserves it).  Never to whine about his coaches or teammates.  Certainly to appreciate Hawk Nation Fans, who have fallen in young with the brainy underdog.  Stud’s got big balls.  His potential is as sky high as his throwing style, because of his physical, emotional and intellectual IQ.